Saturday, January 31, 2009

"No wonder I got shingles"


Last night I had an internal freak out just shy of an ulcer-myocardial infarction-shingles combo meal because I couldn't find our family copy of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. It may be about time for me to get a second job to fill my spare time.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

So many things I love in one half hour


They just said my number one, top all time favorite word, buzzkill, not once, not twice, but THRICE on tonight's episode of "Scrubs".

Keeps great and small on the endless round

I have learned many a nugget of wisdom from Disney movies. I recently learned from the 1998 classic, Brink, that you should never abandon your friends to join a sponsored rollerblading team (SOUL SK8RS 4 LIFE). I also learned that The Hunchback of Notre Dame is totally NOT for children: it is

a.) terrifying
b.) heartbreaking
c.) not funny, despite the vocal stylings of George Costanza
d.) surprisingly and disturbingly sexy, when you combine Esmerelda's gypsy dancing and that bad guy's song about lust (which both also fall under the "terrifying" category*

The Lion King also packs a powerful parabolic punch, teaching children and twenty-year-olds alike that when we find our place on that path unwinding, it's the circle...the circle of life. Well the circle has kept on turning for one of my prized possessions, and unfortunately it has been smushed beneath that circle. 

Alas my favorite keychain from Walt Disney World! With Cinderella's castle etched inside! Why do beautiful things have to die?!

This little keychain has seen some rough times. My sister Erin carelessly dropped it once, carving the once perfect rectangle into a hideous, jagged prism. However, this time it was my own fault for leaving my keys too close to the edge of the kitchen table.

Luckily, all is not lost; my dear friend Carly J. Curtis, during her gig at the homeland in Orlando as Alice in Wonderland, bought me a new keychain after Erin chipped the original one...so the situation is actually alright.
The circle of life comes into play now: with the loss of one good thing, comes the welcoming of an absolutely great thing. Thanks to the wonderful Lauren Hunt, I am now the proud owner of my very own "Arthur" episode, starring me! The episode, "Arthur's New Friend", is literally all about me.


Here I am, ecstatic

And here is an excerpt, for your viewing pleasure. Sorry that my little brother and I are laughing throughout. And I make a weird noise at about 0:26. 

*Sometimes love should be...terrifying...

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Bad news for America. And by America, I mean me


I realize this sounds like an anti-Obama inauguration post from the title, but that was actually just bad timing on my part. I'm totally willing to give Obama a high five, or make a playlist honoring him on my iPod, or connect him to Kevin Bacon*. I like him, and I honestly have high hopes for his presidency.

But enough of that. I am devastated to tell you all that my favorite restaurant, Chili's, has removed the Awesome Blossom from their menu. I don't think I am exaggerating when I say this is a tragedy! And our waiter did not even seem sad when he broke the news to my family last weekend.
I mean look at this--it is BEAUTIFUL. Yes, it may raise one's cholesterol to an alarming rate, and yes, it may be a leading cause of bingo wings, but it is a delicious appetizer that none of us will ever get to enjoy EVER AGAIN.

*Barack Obama is married to Michelle Obama, who appeared on "The Colbert Report" with Stephen Colbert, who was in Bewitched with Nicole Kidman, who was in Far and Away with Tom Cruise, who was in A Few Good Men with Kevin Bacon.