Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Bad news for America. And by America, I mean me

I realize this sounds like an anti-Obama inauguration post from the title, but that was actually just bad timing on my part. I'm totally willing to give Obama a high five, or make a playlist honoring him on my iPod, or connect him to Kevin Bacon*. I like him, and I honestly have high hopes for his presidency.

But enough of that. I am devastated to tell you all that my favorite restaurant, Chili's, has removed the Awesome Blossom from their menu. I don't think I am exaggerating when I say this is a tragedy! And our waiter did not even seem sad when he broke the news to my family last weekend.
I mean look at this--it is BEAUTIFUL. Yes, it may raise one's cholesterol to an alarming rate, and yes, it may be a leading cause of bingo wings, but it is a delicious appetizer that none of us will ever get to enjoy EVER AGAIN.

*Barack Obama is married to Michelle Obama, who appeared on "The Colbert Report" with Stephen Colbert, who was in Bewitched with Nicole Kidman, who was in Far and Away with Tom Cruise, who was in A Few Good Men with Kevin Bacon.


  1. I am astounded they would remove the Awesome Blossom (Extra Awesome) from the menu! Chili's! What were you thinking?! I am almost brought to tears thinking about the mouth-watering succulence that the Awesome Blossom never failed to provide. We are not alone in thinking this is sad, I'm sure Michael Scott is organizing a protest right now.

  2. this is a travesty! really. oh goodness. i was so impressed by the inviting makeover that the orem chilis underwent, and now this. how disappointing.

    and i am still so impressed by your ability to connect anyone to kevin bacon. it's a gift jordyn.

  3. Props on connecting Obama with Kevin Bacon...an amazing talent...I'm jealous

  4. SO... I really missed you at the Amish oatmeal brunch and I love your six degrees of Kevin Bacon. You are the only person I know who could pull that off! Miss you!

  5. Bingo Wings! . I'm working on a set of my own over here. That, and Muffin Tops and a Jelly Belly and I've always just had Moobs. How I love all those cute euphemisms for disgusting fat.
    Can I just say that I'm grateful not to have to be waiting for the tube and realizing how close those ads are to home?


Give it to me straight.