Thursday, February 26, 2009

Word to the Wise


Don't ever watch Steel Magnolias alone in the middle of the night. No matter how strong you tell yourself you are, YOU'RE NOT. You will break down and sob and ruin your sleeves wiping off your mascara and regret it in the morning when you have to go work and your eyes are all puffy and red.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Utah-kin to me?

Don't be intimidated, I'm definitely not clever enough to create such a hilarious pun as in this post's title...I saw it on "The Colbert Report" (from which the majority of clever things come!). But I love President's Day--is it President's or Presidents'? Why does that look so weird?--because it gives me an entire weekend to spend in Provo, Utah with my friends!!! It was a glorious trip, filled with '80s dancing, snowshoeing, Cafe Rio, and America's Next Top Model. And those special chocolate donuts one only seems to find at the Thomas house. Unfortunately, my Coolpix trigger finger has gotten rather rusty since I've been home from London and don't have daily things to document photographically, so I have few pictures to chronicle the trip. Here's a good one:

Beautiful.

Oh and here's a list I composed at work today.

CHOICES THAT DEFINE A PERSON (continued from the one I made in London)
*my choices are italicized*
Backstreet Boys or NSYNC?
Hallows or horcruxes?
Oscars or Grammys?
"Daily Show" or "Colbert Report"?
Disneyworld or Universal Studios?
"Scrubs" or "Grey's Anatomy"?
Chocolate or vanilla? (Although it depends for me...are we talking about ice cream?)
Rihanna or Beyonce?
Twilight or Harry Potter? (And if ANY of you are even THINKING Twilight, or that the two are tied, or any other such blasphemous thought, get ready for a world of hurt)
Pitt or Clooney?
Pearls or diamonds?
Dogs or cats?
Beatles or Elvis?

What other character-defining choices are there?

Friday, February 6, 2009

LIST

I AM A SUCKER FOR:

-anything monogrammed/personalized with my name. This probably stems from the childhood trauma of never finding anything--and I never will find anything without special ordering it--with my name on it. JordAn, however, is quite prevalent.

-puppies

{look at the guy's hand..I think..holding them--these puppies are TEENY!!}

-$5 DVDs...every movie's my favorite and thus a necessity for my DVD repertoire at that price!

-little glasses

-the pet store at the mall...see above for "puppies"

-nail polish

-"America's Next Top Model"

-anything and everything Harry Potter. The other day I almost bought a wizard chess set at Borders, and it's on sale, and maybe I'll go back tomorrow and buy it.

-items I get to personalize myself, such as these cardboard, eco-friendly, color-them-yourself iPod speakers I just bought

{a mere $16 at Urban Outfitters}

{another angle, showcasing the Y and N of my name}

-tights, lately. It doesn't help that I work at a shoe store, where kazillions of tights are sold.

-"That '70s Show". It is ALWAYS on TV, and it's ALWAYS the same episodes, but for some reason I watch it every single time. Isn't that awful?

-Remember the Titans...I have yet to watch this movie without crying. It is SO GOOD

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Reason for laughing hysterically today

I recommend viewing this late at night, whenever you start feeling slap happy.



Andy Samberg is a comic wizard

Sunday, February 1, 2009

You all should've seen this coming

Another Super Bowl has come and gone...and another hot quarterback has lost. Last year the Brady's Ladies (you know who you are...Alex) were met with nothing but defeat and humiliation (but remember the sweet taste of attention from May Hall?), and this year poor Kurt Warner was less than victorious and more than inept at his job.

ANYWAYS, now it's time to prepare for the REAL Super Bowl: THE OSCARS. Movie freaks such as I will gather and gawk at their televisions on February 22nd (pretty sure that's the day) as actors present other actors with those shiny, naked, golden statues. I LOVE the Academy Awards. Here are my "brackets", if you will continue following the admittedly weak sports analogy:

JORDYN'S OSCAR GUESSES (but not necessarily the ones I WANT to win)

Best Picture: Slumdog Millionaire
I haven't seen this yet, but I want to really really bad, and here are the reasons it will probably win:
1.) foreign
2.) independent
3.) not much other representation in other major categories (besides best director I guess)
4.) gut feeling? I just think there's been a lot of late-in-the-game hype that will work in its favor.

Best Actor: Mickey Rourke
Okay, gross I know, but he probably is going to win. I have not and honestly will most likely never watch The Wrestler, but everyone is kissing Rourke's butt about his performance and ignoring all the other nominees, so he'll most likely win. Believe me, I would sooo much rather watch Brad Pitt accept the Oscar. (I'm not going to spoil the hotness/normal-ness of this post with a current picture...no offense if you're reading this, Mr. Rourke. You're clearly just having a 37th day.)

Best Actress: Kate Winslet
I love her, buuut the whole statuatory thing in The Reader is kind of creepy...but like I said, these are my legitimate guesses and not those for whom I would personally vote. It would be cool to see Anne Hathaway win, and she does have that whole indie-film thing going for her, but Kate Winslet is far more beloved.

Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger
As much as it pains me to not put down my fake boyfriend, Robert Downey Jr. (see below), he and the other nominees really don't stand a chance. Well, alright, any one of them could conceivably win and they're all worthy contenders, but Heath has these advantages:
1.) totally horrible/untimely death...obviously...over which I am still heartbroken. I got so sad all over again when I read Entertainment Weekly's homage to the man.
2.) Dark Knight was the blockbuster of the year/movie history, and didn't even get nominated for Best Picture or Best Director (despite Christopher Nolan being the complete shiz), so this is its only real chance at Oscar glory
3.) it's not like they'd be giving him a throwaway award just because he died; hello, he's been nominated before and he's an awesome actor.
4.) TOTALLY deserves the award for his performance anyways.

And that is why I'm voting against Robert Downey Jr.
{he is the greatest}

Best Supporting Actress: Taraji P. Henson?
I don't feel strongly about anyone nominated in this category. They'll probably give it to this girl from Benjamin Button. Power to you, Taraji P. Henson!

Best Director: Ron Howard
I don't know if he'll win, but I love Ron Howard for "Arrested Development" and his childhood role in The Music Man.

Sorry if any or all of you were bored reading this, but like I said, I'm a movie freak who LOVES THE OSCARS so I don't care. Someday, one person who will probably be lying to validate my life and make me feel better about my obsession with movies and their counterparts will thank me for this.