Thursday, April 22, 2010

Clash of the Titans

Every time I watch Star Wars, the inevitable question arises: is Harrison Ford hotter as Indiana Jones or as Han Solo? This has long been debated, and not just by me. Last summer this question was featured on VH1's "The Great Debate" (which we watched religiously because a.) it was a GREAT SHOW and b.) Alex and I took a while to make other friends--not complaining!), and I can't remember who they declared as the winner right now, so I am taking it upon myself to make a decision.

INDIANA JONES
Okay, Indy has a lot of advantages. He is really smart, he has a good job (I'm assuming he's got tenure), he wears glasses (not exactly the Little Glasses that I prefer, as you can see below), he is very resourceful, and he is an archaeologist (which, in fifth grade, was what I wanted to be when I grew up--PS define "grew up." It doesn't mean 21, right? If it does I am a failure with a capital F). Also he is very, very hot, being all tan and sandy and sweaty all the time.


"...it wasn't exactly a turn-on."--"AD"

HAN SOLO
What Han lacks in tact and intellect, he makes up for in flight skills, snark, and pure ballsiness. He has luscious locks and while he may not be interested in the prestigious position of Jedi Knight, his heart of gold motivates him to save the day and help Luke destroy the Death Star in the nick of time. Plus he's a fighter AND a lover...of animals! He loves Chewbacca almost as much as I love Pudge.
I've come to the conclusion that it all depends on which movie one is watching.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Hello, my name is Jordyn, and I'm addicted to Ebay

When I am stressed or whatever, I spend money. It is a very self-destructive habit that doesn't do any literal, physical damage to me--just emotional damage when I run out of money.

Anyways, here are some things I've bought on Ebay during Finals 2010:

-earrings with Js on them:

-original Star Wars trilogy on DVD
-baller sunglasses
-Destiny's Child "This is the Remix" CD...LOVED it in 8th grade. Or 7th grade, or whatever. It is admittedly not as wonderful as I remembered it to be.

It's like I'm saying, "These remixes are mediocre, although I have to admit that Beyonce looks pretty good on the cover!"

So close to freedom...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Just some boys I like

Sorry I've been so list-crazy lately. It's finals week, and this is only way my thoughts will organize themselves. Also: I'm not sure why I numbered this, since my favorite one is actually last on the list.

HOTTIES OF HOLLYWOOD PAST

1. Robert Redford

This isn't from either The Sting or Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, which are my favorites of his movies, but homeboy looks GREAT in this picture. Eeven though I am more partial to his counterpart (see below).

2. Gene Kelly

Singing in the Rain. Seen it? No? Well WATCH IT. It's legitimately HILARIOUS and Gene is studly.

3. Ryan O'Neal

Okay, do NOT look at recent photos of him. You've been warned. Instead, watch What's Up Doc and enjoy. (He's got little glasses in it!)
Also, he looks less like Thomas Haden Church than it seems in this picture.

4. Moondoggie from Gidget

I used my not inconsiderable Microsoft Paint skills to direct your attention away from Big Kahuna and towards Moondoggie. HOT. He wears Lacoste polos a lot.


5. Bernardo from West Side Story

Again, you're welcome for the Paint arrow. And for showing you this hottie.


6. Tony from West Side Story

Boys, take note: this whole retro, Jets look is HOT and back in style. DRESS LIKE TONY! (Bernardo is hot, but his style is too her-name-was-Lola-she-was-a-showgirl)

7. Paul Newman

Love him, love his salad dressing. I know everyone's always like, "Oh George Clooney and Brad Pitt are exactly like Paul Newman and Robert Redford," and I like George and Brad just fine, but NO they are NOT THE SAME. Dang.


In other news, "Glee" is back!! This episode was good, but I cannot condone Mr. Schue's skanky behavior! Get your act together!
The music was fabulous, as usual. This was my favorite, I think. (I'm lazy and the embedding won't work, so just click this link like in the olden days.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AYMofFe3aus

Plus my man Tim Urban is still on "Idol!" He keeps improving (not hard to do when you start at the bottom), and I will die laughing in all your faces if he wins. Even though he won't--Crystal is a shoo-in, obviously.

[thinking] "I am so lucky to have such a devoted girlfriend like Jordyn."

Monday, April 12, 2010

Another inconsequential post

IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME

  • I would go back to the first day of high school, find a certain person, make this person my best friend, and then make him love me. Because after extensive facebook stalking scientific research, I've come to the conclusion that we would be PERFECT for each other.
  • I would start all of my papers ever at least three days before their due dates. I say "all of my papers ever" because I've been an all star procrastinator since elementary school. Not lying to be funny, you can ask my mom.
  • I would never ever sleep while I was in London and spend all my time basking in the presence of the best people ever in the best city ever
  • I would've bought more printer paper today because I have an assignment due tomorrow and I have no idea how it will be printed. How do you make that paper out of newspaper, flower petals, and water again? I made that crap in kindergarten. I have a bunch of old Entertainment Weeklys, would those work?
I'm telling you right now, I'm not using this one for any recycled paper:

I'm partial to Broadway Hugh

Things causing me to sing "Oh What a Beautiful Mornin'" on the inside:
  • LAST DAY OF CLASS IS TOMORROW!
  • Last night we had to open the window in our room because it was too hot to sleep. SURE SIGN OF SUMMER! Also Tabby says sometimes it smells like tacos in our room in the morning. To this I reply: she who smelt it dealt it.
  • the pink is finally completely out of my hair
  • I have some sweet packages coming soon involving sunglasses, Meet the Robinsons, and an old Destiny's Child CD
  • "Glee" is back tomorrow!

I've got a wonderful feeeeeling everything's going my way! (she sang, hopefully not prematurely)

Friday, April 9, 2010

Sunday, April 4, 2010

This one goes out to the birthday boy with the arc reactor in his chest

phone call Robert Downey Jr. is receiving in this picture:

Me: Happy birthday! Are you going to Chili's for dinner? I always do. What presents did you get? Did you get a cake with your face on it? No? Well, we can't all be so lucky. Did you get a cake with my face on it? No? Maybe I gave them the wrong address...

RDJ: Who is this?


me on the other end

Saturday, April 3, 2010

BUZZKILL

NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO
  • 8 page John Dizz-onne pape
  • stupid 291 pape
  • my Creative Writing class veni-vidi-vici-ing (my new favorite phrase...you have been warned.) my stupid, pointless story I wrote at 2 a.m. in class on Monday...I'm debating just wearing my scooter helmet to school to block out the insults
  • finals in general. Can't this semester just END? And just cancel finals like in Chamber of Secrets? We just need someone to see the Basilisk's eyes in a puddle. I'll volunteer whoever hates my story most in my Creative Writing class.
I had a blast with my family this week, but they're driving home tomorrow and it's the pits. To remedy potential depression, I'm listening to "Catch My Disease" and Hannah Montana's "Nobody's Perfect," and I'm going to eat some crappy food and watch Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

BTW I didn't see Jon Hamm in Cafe Rio. April Fools. I know at least two people believed me. And one of them is my 12-year-old sister. And the other one is Carly.

Honestly, General Conference is keeping me sane this weekend. Neeeeeeed it.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Of course this would happen to ME


HEY I just saw JON HAMM at CAFE RIO and of course I didn't have Coolpix on hand. BUZZKILL!!!
In other buzzkill news, I bought Sherlock Holmes yesterday, and I haven't had time to watch it yet.