Thursday, May 20, 2010


Let's get this over with:

I have now seen Iron Man 2 twice. At my first viewing, I tricked my body into thinking it was awake using a.) lots of caffeine and b.) taking a nap at 8 PM after being coerced into attending the midnight premiere after sleeping maybe 5 hours the previous night and working 8 hours (My friends are FABULOUS and always know what I actually want to do, even when I think I need to listen to Common Sense). Needless to say I enjoyed it--but was a little confused by the trillion different plots and themes. In fact, I have access to some text drafts I used to take notes during the movie primary sources from the evening; shall we?

  • "granted i was biting my lip for almost the entire movie" [hmm. Not sure why "Granted" was necessary here. I'm not going to comment on the content here because it's preeeetty self-explanatory]
  • "looks fabulous in wife beat" [obviously]
  • "red iron man is way hotter than silver" [well it is true.]
  • "i prefer my mickey rourkes clothed" [seriously. Were the tighty whiteys necessary? We KNOW he's probably really poor. Give the man some boxers and some sort of shirt, for crying out loud]

I actually liked it even more the second time I watched it. The kazillion plots didn't bother me the second time, probably because not only was I coherent and not artificially sustaining my body but also because I was expecting it and could just focus on what mattered: all the hilarious jokes and Robert Downey Jr's tuchus. Despite laaaaaame jokes in the trailers ("I've got my eye on you"? Seriously??? How stupid do you think we are?!) This movie was seriously Funny, thanks to RDJ, Sam Rockwell (Guy Fleegman, which I didn't remember until the second time. Humiliating.), Don Cheadle, and even Gwyneth on some occasion. I love when Pepper and Tony have sexy arguments. Plus that whole thing with the strawberries was SO funny to me, particularly the second time around. Not sure why.

Tony: "Pepper, stop acting constipated. Stop flaring your nostrils."
Pepper: [thinking] Homeboy looks GOOOOOOD in that suit
Anyways, yes I greatly enjoyed this movie. I love that Jon Favreau let the cast totally adlib in almost every scene. I mean, you have ROBERT DOWNEY JR, who is an adlib machine! Play to your undeniable, inconquerable strengths!!
And before I forget:
Qualms with the movie:
1. Scarlett Johansson. So tired of her playing the slut. She had NO personality in this movie, AT ALL, which felt reeeeally annoying in a movie in which its characters' strong personalities are what make it all different than other superhero movies. To quote "Community," "[Scarlett's] lack of flavor is almost a flavor." Plus Favreau, why don't you just write a makeout scene for the two of you already. Yeesh.
2. ...
Maybe Scarlett was the only thing I disliked. Typical.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

"You're a poet, and you didn't even know you"

A Sonnet to Express My Current State

Today I left my phone upon my bed
Right now it sits alone, abandoned there
I couldn't hear the pleas it prob'ly said
While I was standing near, straightening my hair.
"Your outfit has no pockets!" cried my phone,
"You seal my fate by setting me down here!"
But I was singing Heart's great song "Alone,"
And now I sit at work, immersed in fear.
For I may get a text, a call, a date
And I won't know 'till it is far too late.

(Yes, I may be missing some lines to make this a structurally sound sonnet, but I don't care at all. Well, I care enough to make this disclaimer.)

Update: Nikki was right--I only missed one text, and it was from the daily automated coupon people. Oh, and I not only forgot my phone today, but I also forgot my keys and left my aforementioned straightener on. I nearly burned a hole in my tea cozy*!

*my monogrammed shower wrap